_ANECDOTS

MOST FAMOUS MAN WHO EVER LIVED
            One day many years ago at a school in South London a teacher said to the class of 5-year-olds, "I'll give $20 to the child who can tell me who was the most famous man who ever lived."
            An Irish boy put his hand up and said, "It was St. Patrick." The teacher said, "Sorry Alan, that's not correct."
            Then a Scottish boy put his hand up and said, "It was St. Andrew." The teacher replied, "I'm sorry, Hamish, that's not right either.
            Finally, a Gujarati boy raised his hand and said, "It was Jesus Christ." The teacher said, "That's absolutely right, Jayant, come up here and I'll give you the $20."

As the teacher was giving Jayant his money, she said, "You know Jayant, since you are Gujarati, I was very surprised you said Jesus Christ." Jayant replied, "Yes, in my heart I knew it was Lord Krishna, but business is business!"

IN RABBIT HEAVEN
            Once there was a married couple who promised each other that who ever died first would come back to tell the other what heaven was like. It happened to be that the husband died first. And sure enough, one evening the wife heard the voice of her husband, and she asked him, so what was it like.
            He began to describe, “Well, first I get up in the morning and have an organic salad, then I have sex, then I eat again, then in the afternoon I have more sex. Then I have another meal of natural food, and again have more sex in the evening before I go to sleep.”
            The wife was quite surprised at this and asked, “So that is what it is like in heaven.”
            The husband replied, “Who said anything about heaven? I’m a bunny rabbit in Kansas.”

A YOGI’S HELL _Once a yogi_
who did not fulfill his vows was taken to a special hell. He was brought to a place where he stood in front of three rooms to choose one for his place to serve his time. He was taken to one room where he saw everyone standing on their heads on a cement floor. The yogi imagined how painful it would be to stand on his head on cement and then wanted to see the other room. In the next room he saw everyone standing on their heads on a wooden floor. This wasn’t as bad, yet it would still tough. Then he looked into the third room and saw a group of people sitting at tables having coffee, but they were knee deep in stool. He thought this was quite bad, but he supposed he could tolerate sitting around having coffee all day, even if you were knew deep in stool. So he chose this room. Then the devil that was showing him around said, “OK, just take a seat.”
So the fallen yogi walked into the room and took a seat at a table and ordered coffee. But a minute later another guy comes in the door. He blows a whistle and yells out, “All right everybody. Coffee break is over, back on your heads.”